By Anne Krueger
STAFF WRITER
October 22, 2005
Growing up in Rancho San Diego, Auday Arabo saw the toll that running three grocery stores took on his father. He knew he'd never want to follow in his footsteps.
So Arabo can appreciate the irony that he now heads an organization representing 1,000 independent grocery stores. He took the post 2½ years ago, giving up a job he loved as a lawyer with the San Diego County District Attorney's Office.
His father swayed his decision by recounting his own experience as a store owner.
"He said when he was in the stores, we never had anybody to really look out for us, to protect us, to be our voice," Arabo said.
Since Arabo, 29, took over as head of the California Independent Grocers & Convenience Stores, he has become the voice of the trade organization, as well as a budding political figure.
Like Arabo, about half of the members of the association are Chaldean, a Christian minority in Iraq.
Some are watching his career and nudging him toward prominence. They see him continuing the political tradition of one of the state's few Chaldean politicians, Wadie Deddeh, who served in the state Assembly and Senate for 27 years.
Deddeh, 85, who is Arabo's grandmother's cousin, lunches regularly with his protege.
"He is a very ambitious young man," Deddeh said. "He has an objective, a very specific one. He wants to serve the country where he grew up."
Like many children of immigrants, Arabo sees himself as a living model of a culture clash. Part of him wants to strike out on his own, yet he feels the strong pull of his family and the expectations placed on him as the eldest of five children.
His latest living arrangements illustrate that. Arabo had bought a condominium in San Carlos, but he returned to live in his parents' Rancho San Diego home after his 53-year-old father became critically ill.
"Family is very important to me," Arabo said. "He was there for us for a lot of years. It's only fair that we're there for them when they need us."
San Diego County, with about 30,000 Iraqis, has the third-largest Iraqi population in the country, behind Detroit and Chicago.
Arabo has become a well-known member of the Chaldean community, serving on the parish council of St. Peter Chaldean Catholic Cathedral in Rancho San Diego. He is also a member of the Chaldean American Bar Association.
In an interview in his cramped office in La Mesa, Arabo talked about the "turning points" that brought him to his current position. Dressed in a dark suit, he spoke in measured tones, exuding a charm that befits an aspiring politician.
Arabo's family came here from Iraq in 1979, when he was three years old. His parents had a hotel, an import-export business and a winery in Baghdad.
"They left everything and started anew. We started from scratch," he said.
His father, uncles and grandfather eventually bought supermarkets in San Diego, National City and Lakeside, naming them Wrigley's. Arabo worked in the stores growing up, and knew that wasn't the life he wanted for himself.
"I didn't like it that my dad was in the stores 16 hours a day when I was young," Arabo said. "The industry took my dad away from me. He didn't come to ball games. But he did the best he could."
Arabo attended Grossmont Community College, where a class in political theory ignited a passion for politics. He transferred to San Diego State University, earning honors as the top student in the political science department when he graduated in 1998.
Arabo then took an entry-level position on the Washington, D.C., staff of then-Rep. Brian Bilbray, R-Imperial Beach. He was awe-struck by such Washington sights as the U.S. Capitol illuminated at night.
"It's just the most beautiful sight you can imagine," he said. "The first couple days, I just had a smile the whole time."
After a year working in Bilbray's office, Arabo said he realized he needed a law degree to advance his career. His parents were horrified that he had left San Diego. They wanted him home.
Their wishes and a scholarship brought him back to San Diego, where he attended California Western School of Law. After graduating in 2001, he got a job as a post-graduate law clerk at the District Attorney's Office.
He worked there for more than a year, handling misdemeanors, felonies and drug court cases. Arabo said he loved being in the courtroom, but was frustrated in his efforts to get employment as a prosecutor because of an office hiring freeze.
In early 2003, members of the grocers' organization approached Arabo about heading the group. He still hoped to become a deputy district attorney and told them he wasn't interested. They approached him again.
Wadie Deddeh's son, Superior Court Judge Peter Deddeh, advised Arabo to stay at the District Attorney's Office.
Wadie Deddeh, whom Arabo calls "uncle" as a sign of respect, said he told his younger relative the job with the grocers' group would better advance his political career.
"People will know who Auday is. How many can name 10 members of the DA's office? He listened. He said, 'Uncle, I think you are right,' " Deddeh said.
Arabo took the job, and reluctantly left his hopes of becoming a prosecutor behind.
"There were days in the beginning when I was like, what am I doing? I really missed it," he said.
Now the job has become all-consuming. Arabo, who is single, said he works too much to pursue a relationship.
Basil Zetouna, the current board chairman, said he was confident Arabo would be a good leader despite his relative youth.
"He's cool under pressure. He does not let anything get to him. I call him Mr. Impossible," he said, noting that Arabo has a talent for quickly solving tough problems.
One of Arabo's most notable forays into the public eye came last year when the El Cajon City Council proposed a tobacco licensing ordinance for merchants, the first in the county.
Arabo spoke out against the proposed ordinance, and questioned the methodology of a survey by the American Lung Association that showed 41 percent of El Cajon merchants sold tobacco to minors. His group accused the council of violating the Ralph M. Brown Act, the state's open-meeting law, in its vote to impose the licensing fee.
El Cajon Councilman Gary Kendrick, the biggest backer of the tobacco licensing law, said the City Council got off to a rough start with Arabo after he alleged the Brown Act violation.
"I think that accusing someone of committing a crime is not an effective way to persuade them to change their mind," Kendrick said.
The council ultimately amended its tobacco licensing ordinance so that merchants paid lower fees, but higher fines if they sold tobacco to minors.
Arabo said dealing with local officials has been among the low points of his job.
"Politics is not a bad thing. It's an honor," he said. "It's just what certain people have done to bring disgrace."
When Arabo signed on with the grocers' organization in 2003, he committed to working for them for five years. Part of him still dreams of returning to the courtroom. Zetouna and others said they'd like to see Arabo enter politics.
"That would definitely be my ultimate goal," Arabo said. "But life is all about timing."
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Anne Krueger: (619) 593-4962; anne.krueger@uniontrib.com
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